Memphis Part Two

The excerpt of this blog post can basically be the entire blog post. All summarized in one sentence with ellipses etc.

So after the first day of my conference and my first performance, I sat down and was nervous thinking about my appointment with Steve Laube. While listening to the speeches and announcements, I heard God relay unto my spirit to "Prepare". Basically prepare for the appointment with Mr. Laube. I had been waiting for this moment for months but what can I accomplish with him within a ten minute timeframe? Especially since I did not have a manuscript.

You all I did just that. I prepared to meet with him. Prayer, Chat GPT, etc I prepared. I had two fellow authors who were members of the ACFW pray over me because I was nervous. I prayed. I had my siblings pray and then it was time to meet with Mr. Laube.

I was warned by many that he was not easy... blah, blah, blah. I am not going to type everything that was said about him. I will say he was very nice to me. I did not agree with everything he said and advised me with. I did not have time to counter or argue against his points. I literally did not have the time. It was ten minutes long. I enhoyed the interaction but felt it was a waste since he did 90 percent of the talking.

However, God telling me to come to Memphis, that there was something there for me, to prepare for my meeting with Laube had a purpose. I immediately assumed that because God had me out here and I abiding in obedience, it would possbly lead me to Mr. Laube being intertested in becoming my agent after pitching my book idea. Man that couldn't be further from the truth. Based on my pitch, he said my book idea is a skeleton... how was he even able to assume that when I haven't even disclosed all of my information regarding it.

Ladies and gentleman, I did NOT guard my heart.

As I mentioned, he stated some things about my book idea that were further from the truth. When I think sci-fi, I think vast imaginations, different world, new technology etc. Nothing is impossible. All of those things are in my book but because there was a judicial court system, court mandated mental health and substance abuse counseling it was not considered "futuristic" enough.

Another critique regarding my book idea is that Christianity cannot be banned in the United States or the world. He said there would be a civil war if that were the case. I nodded my head to let him know I was listening to him but I did NOT agree with it 100%. There are too many cowards in the Western Civilization and it is because of the comforts here. Jesus said it in John that "no servant is greater than their master" There will always be persecution in the world.

When I think about the Coptics in Egypt beheaded by ISIS or Christians in Pakistan awaiting trial or Nigerian Christian women being kidnapped, forced to convert into Islam and being married off to Boko Haram members or a Christian street preacher arrested for spreading "hate" in London when all he did was preach the gospel of Jesus (London is no longer a Western city in my honest opinion but I digress)... I can go on and on and on.

Not everyone is going to fight back against those doing the persecution because of their faith. When it comes to this, there are two camps of believers, those that understand that persecution and martyrdom will reap a reward in Heaven whereas there are those who will try to fight back and defend those being persecuted in the faith. Those who are willing to lose their lives versus those that want to fight back.

I recall a conversation with a Sister in the faith where I told her I am more than willing to die for my Master. She said that it was easy for me to say. I know who I serve and it would be an honor to die for my Master. I know who I serve. He laid down His life for me, and I would do it only in His name. My Spirit is willing even if my flesh trembles.

Notice I am using actual examples of persecution outside of the West. I recall here in the States where a baker refused to bake cake for a gay couple and it lead to a lawsuit. That is nothing compared to what believers across the globe are experiencing. Organizations such as Voice of the Martyrs covers the persecution of brothers and sisters in the faith.

In Matthew 10:33, Jesus says, "But whoever denies me before men, I also will deny before my Father who is in heaven".

Matthew 24:13: "But the one who endures to the end will be saved"

Rev 2:10 "Do not fear what you are about to suffer. Behold, the devil is about to throw some of you into prison, that you may be tested, and for ten days you will have tribulation. Be faithful unto death, and I will give you the crown of life." (Though this was for the church of Smyrna, it still applies to ALL believers today and forever and always)

I have gone off on a tangent but the point I am really trying to drive home is that even I myself as a Westerner am comfortable but I know what will happen to me before I deny my Master before man. It would be an honor to lay my life down for Him. I know who I serve.

I apologize for going off on a tangent. There is a reason why Christianity is banned in the world of my book. A Pressing Emergency, a four/five book series, will contain a prequel of twenty years before the Project Lazarus experiment. It will provide an explanation through a chain of events as to why Christianity was banned in America and the world.

Lastly, he was not keen on the idea that the story is set in 2066 AD. He believes it is not far enough in the future. I mentioned 2066 because from that year on out the time period would be considered late 21st century. I like the year because it is far enough to wonder and speculate what would happen and close enough to potentially see it.

After my meeting with him, I was discouraged. So much so I did not attend any more workshops or any of the continuing education classes. I got depressed and was very upset. It did not help that my "friend" came wghich led to me crashing out.

An author called him a dream killer. He did not kill my dream because this book is NOT my dream but God's and He always gets His way.

What was the point of me being in Memphis? What was the point of me meeting with Mr. Laube? Why did He tell me to "Prepare?!!!" Why even bother with all of this?

I had wasted my accrued PTO from a job I HATE, money and overall well being to come to Memphis. I had to flyout to Memphis for God to relay something unto my spirit that could have been done in NYC at zero cost. I am not happy for I had surrendered so much for Him to tell me in Memphis that He wanted me to write and then publish this book independently. Independently? Independently!

With what money and time? I have bills. I am happily unmarried and wouldn't want to rely on a spouse. I do not like relying on people very much. I only trust God and sometimes I trust myself more than Him.

Why pitch this book idea in Memphis? I already had prophetic words that my book (my ministry) will go through hardships and roadblocks.My first prophetic word was 2020 but I had no idea what kind of ministry God called me to. It took three years for Him to reveal that it was for a book.

I feel like I was being tested in regards to faith. How far was I willing to go in Hisa name? That is what it feels like.

Man I have cried while being in Memphis. I have never cried so much while being on 'vacation'. I haven't cried this much not even for a guy. Not even for an ex.

I do remember what was prophesied to me in 2020 regarding my ministry...

"I will possess territory in places I thought I would never get into"... and I will in the Mighty Name of JESUS. I have been blessed with favor.

Now I am going to be an independent author who has to do everything with little time and resources.

Pfft. Man I am so po'd right now.